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Confessions of a Blogger with Post-Partum Depression

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Those of you who regularly follow my blog may have noticed a lot of links to guest posts over the last few weeks. I haven’t been posting much fresh content because I’ve spent a week in the psychiatric ward of Georgetown University Hospital for acute post-partum depression. As it turns out, I’ve been sick for a long time without realizing. it.

Experimental Wifery will continue to be a site about learning to be a better woman and wife. But over the next few weeks and months, much of what I’ll be learning will be skills to cope with and protect myself from depression–important skills that will make me a better woman and wife. So in addition to our normal content about being savvy, sensitive, sharp, skilled, and smart, I’ll also be posting about techniques I’m learning that every woman and wife can use to protect and improve her mental health–things that can keep us sane.

In the meantime, I expect to continue posting three times a week, but I hope you’ll excuse me if I must take a mental health day or two. And, while I’m not a doctor or expert of any kind, I would be happy to hear your experience via Facebook, Twitter, or experimentalwifery@gmail.com. I’ll also be responding to all comments to posts about mental health.

Although I try not to make my blog too personal, I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It has been an amazing source of comfort during a very difficult period of my life.

26 responses »

  1. praying for you!

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  2. Oh, I am so so sorry about the PPD! I’ve been struggling with it for the past 8 1/2 months since my third baby was born and I think I can say that it has been one of the hardest things I’ve ever dealt with thus far. I also spent the first few months convincing myself that what I was feeling was normal and telling myself that I just needed to “suck it up” and stop dwelling on the hard parts of the adjustment to three kids. Turns out I needed more than that and once I finally admitted it, it was very freeing. Still hard, but at least I knew what I was dealing with. I hope that you are also able to find ways to work through it.

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    • My husband told me tonight that, because we were able to tell people what was wrong so they understand the way I act, I’m the only one really suffering from my depression anymore. That meant a lot to me and was a huge reward for beginning to take care of myself. Best wishes for your recovery!

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  3. Incredible, Allison! You are so savvy, sensitive, sharp, skilled and smart, and I know that you are in the best medical, spiritual and familial hands possible. You go, girl! Sending love from this small distance…
    …Jaynee

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  4. Sending you hugs and support from Postpartum Progress.

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  5. I think that mental health is something that is often ignored when considering how to improve our lives. We all think about achieving more, faster, better etc and don’t tend to think about the effect it has on our heads.

    I don’t know what it is like now, but previously post-natal depression was dismissed, and I’m glad that it’s being taken seriously for you. I really hope you’re able to get all the assistance you need and feel able to speak about it and lean on people.

    I look forward to sharing your journey as you work out which methods of coping are best for you. I found that publicly declaring actions and coping strategies has helped me to follow through with them, and at the most difficult times, has kept me going through sheer stubbornness. Perhaps it will be the same for you too.

    Remember that everyone has difficulties and you aren’t weak for admitting them or feeling things. We are all supporting you, even if we don’t really know you!

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    • Thanks for the encouragement. I love to teach, so knowing I can teach other women tools to help them in their everyday lives makes it easier to be enthusiastic about the intensive therapy program I’m in right now.

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  6. You are amazing Alison!

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  7. Praying for you friend…for His healing and peace as you walk through this.

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  8. Praying for your health and looking forward to hearing your story. Hugs.

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  9. I’m very impressed with you for being open about this! I’m sure you will help a lot of people through your sharing…. May God bless you and your husband as you go through this together. May He strongly support you and restore you to full health soon.

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  10. Allison, I’m so proud of you for facing this “demon” head on! I went through a bout of depression in my late 40’s (menopause, what a ugly word!!) and thought I was losing my mind! I’ve always been a happy, healthy person and have always been able to cope with anything. Even when I went through my divorce, which was the lowest point in my adult life, I was still able to maintain my good outlook on life. I couldn’t figure out what was wrong with me and was embarrassed to admit that I had issues. Depression is a serious illness but is treatable and I’m living proof of that! You are doing the right thing for YOU, Adam and Thomas. I assure you, you will come out of this a stronger, more capable woman! My thoughts and prayers are with you through this journey and we’ll be here for you if you need anything. Love you so much!

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  11. marilyn Fincher

    I am praying for you and I know the Lord will help you through this. I Love you very much and still cherish your visit taking care of me during my recuperation this summer! It was a blessing I never would have had if I had not broken my ankle. Thank you again.

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  12. Alison, thank you for sharing your journey with us. We pray for you every day. Sending our love and support across many miles… I think one of the biggest things I need reminding of in difficult times is that things will not always be this way. We thank God for you and your friendship, and for the love and resources He has provided you to keep walking through this particular desert. You will make it through this, and things will not always be this way.

    With that said, the other nugget of advice I hold in my heart is from my sister, who helped me learn that it’s ok to have a bad day, and be in a rough patch. That acceptance helps me not to double my pain by feeling bad for feeling bad. Acceptance over self-punishment has taken a long time for me to learn, but it really makes a difference to let acceptance soak in.

    Love and prayers 🙂

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    • Thank you so much for that reminder, Amy. I’m going through a lot of counseling about ways to overcome my guilt about my illness–and many other things.

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  13. GC at Calm.Healthy.Sexy.

    I have just discovered your blog and am happy to have found it. I’m so sorry that you are going through this struggle. Please take good care of yourself and give yourself time to heal. There is absolutely nothing for you to feel “guilty” about – you have an illness, you are receiving treatment for it, you will get well – but it takes time. Be sure to get regular physical exercise as soon as you are able – it can be very helpful for recovering from depression.

    Gaye

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    • Exercise has helped a lot. I’m in a partial hospitalization program now where I spend almost a full day at an out-patient treatment center, so I haven’t found time the last few days for exercise. But I do walk about a mile and a half for my commute, which noticeably lifts my spirits.

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  14. I just discovered your blog a short while ago, but I love the content! I am so sorry to hear that you are going through this. I’m praying for you.

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  15. Alison, I was thinking about you and your family and I just came across your blog. You will overcome this and I believe in you. You are special and a blessing. I’ll always pray for you, Adam and Thomas. Please feel free to email or text me, if I can offer my assistance. Love, Phyllis.

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  16. So nice to see your writing, my new friend. Your comments are honest and open, sweet and (possibly too) humbled, just like you. Glad to see you are feeling better.

    Reply

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